I’m curious as to my readers’ experiences having to do with the issue of parental pressure to have kids. I know it exists in the CF community, and that some people have experienced more of it than others. I’ll start off by sharing my experiences, then I encourage everyone to chime in with theirs.
When I outright admitted I didn’t want children, my parents were mixed on it. My mother I never got any problem from. She’s always been accepting of my childfree choice and has always given me her blessing to live my life the way I see fit. In fact, we often joke about my vasectomy procedure, to which she comes back, “It’s ok. You and your sisters were enough anyway!” I love my mother. 😛
My father, on the other hand, was totally outraged. Every person in his family was married with children and dammit that’s what I was going to be to. He wouldn’t have any of it. He hounded me day in and day out about it pretty much right up until he died (thank god he finally kicked the bucket). I was to raise up LDS children and pass on the “good family name” as every male child in the family had done. Needless to say, he made my life hell.
Things only got worse after he found out about me getting a vasectomy. The fur flew in ways it’s never flown before. I don’t recall him ever being as angry as he was when he found out (with the exception of the day I resigned from the LDS Church). He basically tried to make me feel guilty, and to be even more condescending he said he was going to pay for my reversal. As if I was going to! He just didn’t get it or accept any of my life decisions, really.
I stood firm though, and I know I’ll be a happier person because of it. My advice to my CF friends is to never back down. Just because they’re your parents doesn’t mean you have to listen to them. It’s your life, live it the way you want.
As I said, please share your experiences in the comments. I’m curious to know how you deal with this, if you have to at all.
(Note: I apologize for any typos. The wireless card in my laptop died so I’m having to blog from my iPhone, and you know how autocorrect is and how hard it is to type on sometimes.)