Monthly Archives: June 2012

I Support Brat Bans

Brat bans are a hot topic as of late, with businesses banning little kids quickly popping up all over the place. Restaurants, airlines, movie theaters, among other types of businesses are restricting kids, and I say it’s about darn time.

Nothing, and I mean NOTHING, ruins a meal at my favorite restaurant quicker than an annoying, screaming, bratty kid going nuts. I’ll be in my seat eating in peace and then along comes an annoying little shit who does nothing but disrupt my fine dining experience. I have very, very sensitive hearing and I can hear a kid crying from a mile away, so it doesn’t even have to be anywhere near my table. Further, if a family with a kid comes down and sits near me, I avoid confrontation at all costs by quickly packing up, paying my ticket, and leaving. I don’t want to be anywhere near them.

Also, when I was working airline I had one incident where I was tasked with landing a fully loaded Boeing 737-800 with 152 people on board (including crew) in a thunderstorm. For those of you who have never taken the reigns to a jumbo jet, let me just tell you that landing one in a thunderstorm is no easy task with no other distractions present. Well, there was another distraction present: a screaming kid in the first row of First Class. In other words, right behind the cockpit. Yes, you can hear that shit from up there. That was miserable. I was trying to tune it out and focus on the task at hand (landing the plane safely) but that just made the task even harder. I got the plane down safely, obviously, but Jesus fucking Christ. It about drove me up the wall. I wanted to confront the parents of that stupid fucking kid as they got off the plane but I held my tongue despite having to be restrained by the Captain. I was livid.

Then the bowling alley: a place that is usually overrun with kids who get away with displaying poor bowling etiquette and throwing their wall-eyed hissy fits every time their little uncoordinated arms throw a gutterball. Yeah, not conducive for someone like me, a professional-caliber bowler who’s seriously trying to practice or put up high scores despite difficult lane conditions. In this case, children go from being simply an annoyance to affecting my pin count, my average, and everything. If those drop too fast, I could lose my PBA card, which is NOT an idea I particularly fancy.

Whatever the case, yeah. Kids are disruptive, they’re annoying, and in a lot of cases, a threat to safety (as in the case of me landing a fully loaded jumbo jet mid-thunderstorm). This is why I support brat bans. Banning kids from fine restaurants, first class cabins, and after certain hours at bowling alleys, movie theaters, etc. would be a smart business move. Whatever little business they lost would quickly be made up for by people of my ilk who want a peaceful, kid-free night. And actually, studies show that businesses who enact brat bans are booming and seeing more business than ever. Chew on that, breeder brigade!

Now, some people are questioning the ethics of such practices, and I’ve seen some go on the slippery slope argument about how it’ll lead to LGBT bans, etc. at businesses. You know what? I don’t care. I believe business owners have the right to ban whoever they want from entering their doors. If they want to ban LGBT people, straight people, atheists, Christians, blacks, whites, kids, men, women, senior citizens, or whoever, I think that is their right, and I think laws that say otherwise are a load of crap and an infringement upon a business owner’s rights. Businesses should be able to cater to whoever they want, and likewise, refuse to cater to whoever they want as well.

And yes, if I owned a business like a restaurant, bowling alley, etc. it would be adults only. Period, end of story. I wouldn’t want kids entering my place of business for the peace of mind of my patrons. I can guarantee you I’d make serious money too.

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Disgusting Kids Bully 68 Year Old Woman

I’m sure most of you have seen this by now, but if you have not be forewarned that the following video contains very disturbing footage. What you are about to see is a bunch of sick, unruly middle schoolers bullying a 68 year old woman. The video is 10 minutes, if you can even make it through it.

They make fun of everything from her hair to her weight and everything in between. Probably the most callous comment, though, was the one where they said she was so ugly her kids should kill themselves. Unbeknownst to them, her son committed suicide some 10 years ago. Yeah, foot meet mouth, motherfuckers? (Not that they care, but yeah.)

And people wonder why I say 99% of parents these days fucking suck at being parents. IT’S FUCKING NASTY BULLSHIT LIKE THIS WHY US CHILDFREE FOLK ARE SO HOSTILE TOWARD YOUR SORRY BREEDER ASSES. You think this kind of shit is funny, and even if you don’t, you encourage it with your lack of parenting and discipline, and WE’RE the ones that get to put up with the worst of the fruits of your lack of parenting skills. Your lack of a backbone to step up to the plate and actually be parents are why we get so irritated with you and your kids. Instead of being respectful, upstanding citizens, your children reek like the smelly crotch feces they are, and it’s YOUR FUCKING FAULT! It’s all this “no spanking” and “attachment parenting” crap that’s making the next generation the way it is today. I remember when I was a kid if I’d have acted like that I’d have gotten my butt worn out and maybe then some. There is no deterrent force at work in these kids because of your failure to instill the fear of you and the consequences in them.

That said, now my attention turns to the school. I don’t know what disciplinary action (if any) was taken, but I hope you’re taking this matter seriously. If these kids’ gene donors won’t parent, unfortunately it becomes up to you to become the parents. You need to take this matter seriously. I can tell you right now if it had been me, I’d have placed them in what we called “alternative education placement” in school where they could deal with more of their own kind and see how tough they really were. Let me tell you that place was/is not fun. If that didn’t fix the problem, the next step would have been expulsion. That said, I highly doubt these fuckers got so much as detention and is further evidence of how public school systems worldwide are failing.

So, my dear breeder brigade, in case you were wondering why we CFers can be so hostile at times, there’s your answer. If you’d actually be parents shit like this wouldn’t happen and quite frankly we’d have nothing to complain about (or, well, much less to complain about). Once you quit turning a blind eye to how out-of-line and totally destructive your children are, maybe we’ll start turning a blind eye to your kids, but not until then. You better straighten yourselves and your kids up NOW. I don’t want to see the consequences that will befall if you don’t.

“What If You Change Your Mind?”

OK, fine, I’ll bite on this one and feed the troll. Quite frankly I’ll never change my mind as I have felt the same way about children and not wanting them since I was a little kid myself (I never in my life have wanted children), but just for grins and giggles let’s say for whatever reason I *DID* change my mind. What would I do?

Well, the first option many would suggest is vasectomy reversal, but that definitely isn’t happening. I’ve already subjected my junk to enough trauma for a lifetime, I don’t need any more. Besides, vasectomy reversal is ridiculously expensive and only works about half the time anyway, so it’s an expensive yet not very realistic option. Strike that.

Rather, I see absolutely no reason to add to the ever-growing overpopulation problem myself. There are already way too many children in foster homes, orphanages, or in government custody that need good homes. That’s where I would go. I don’t have the time or desire to care for babies, so I wouldn’t adopt a baby. Everyone wants to adopt babies anyway, and nobody gives a second thought to adopting older children. It works the same way with human babies as it works with pets. The puppies/kittens go fast, the adult dogs/cats usually wind up getting put down because nobody wants them. Sad, but true.

So, in the astronomically small chance I do change my mind, I feel I would be doing the greatest good by adopting an older child instead of having children biologically or adopting a baby, and that’s the route I’d take.

Of course, keep in mind this is a hypothetical situation with a 99.999% chance of never happening, so don’t ever count on it happening. 😉

Obligatory Fathers’ Day Post

Just thanking you GOOD fathers out there for doing what you do. You truly are in the minority. That said, the service you provide is extremely valuable and essential to raising a generation of moral, upstanding citizens.

I envy your kids. I wish I’d have had the positive role model you provide them. Both my bioloical and step fathers were pieces of shit (why do you think I said no to donating a kidney to the latter?), so you know, you mean more to your kids than you think.

Those of you who are lucky enough to be stuck with the small percentage of fathers in the world.who are actually worth a damn, do something special for them today. They deserve it.

Not Friends Anymore (With New Parents)

I can’t count how many times in the past I’ve been really good friends with someone before they had children, and then no matter how much I liked them or how good of friends we were, all of a sudden when their kid was born we were no longer friends. It’s happened time and time again.

Quite frankly I don’t care if someone wants to have kids. I really don’t. I don’t comprehend why anyone would willingly subject themselves to raising a kid and all that goes along with it (not the least of which include incessant crying, shit-filled diapers, the ridiculously high price tag, among everything else), especially since that’s an investment that yields absolutely no return whatsoever, but I don’t judge them for it. It’s their life and they can live it however they wish, and who am I to tell them what they can and can’t do with their lives? I believe in personal freedom and liberty for all people, so far be it from me to get in the way of someone else’s life.

So here we go. A friend gets pregnant and then announces it to everyone they know. All her friends are all over her congratulating her and whatever, except for me. I don’t say anything whatsoever, other than an “oh, okay” and I left it at that. I didn’t make a fuss about it, and I definitely didn’t pull the same card breeders pull of “you’ll regret it someday.” She gets all bent out of shape that I didn’t say exactly what I was supposed to (“congratulations, you’ll be a wonderful mother”). It’s as though I was supposed to be reading from a script or something.

Fastforward nine months. The baby is born and she is showing off her baby pictures on Facebook and whatever. Of course I don’t want to to look at them (and she should know this), so why didn’t she select the “hide this from” option on her Facebook and hide them from me, that way I didn’t have to look at that? No, I don’t want to see pictures of your baby any more than I want to see pictures of your dog taking a dump. Yet again, she gets really angry with me for not being all “Awww, how cute” and congratulating her. Except this time I didn’t say anything at all. Not even “oh, okay” as I knew that upset her last time. I bit my tongue, even though I eventually had to hide her posts from my inbox because I got tired of having to look at another baby picture every other fucking day.

Of course, for the next month I heard nothing out of her, which is to be expected. She’s incredibly busy which I completely understand. A newborn baby is a lot of work, and I know that and have experienced something similar raising a newborn puppy. The next thing I hear out of her is making up excuses for why we can’t be friends anymore, and she never once mentioned the real reason why. She lied to her other friends about me, said I “turned on her.” She said I “played her.” Of course, neither of these accusations are true. I just didn’t feel the same excitement she did over her new kid, so therefore I wasn’t worthy of her time and had to go.

Well, my case is hardly unique. I hear similar stories from childfree people all the time. A friend has a kid and suddenly their friendship dissolves. It’s happened to me more than once, actually. It’s a sad state of affairs, but I also believe it speaks to a double standard. They think it’s perfectly OK to badger us about not having children, saying we’ll regret it or that we’ll change our minds or that they feel sorry for us. Yet, when we make the same sentiments and/or don’t share their excitement for bringing their little “bundle of joy” into their lives, we’re horrible people, and in my experience new mothers have the absolute WORST superiority complex of all. I hate to say it, but it’s the God’s honest truth.

Now, this is not to say it’s this way with all parents or all new mothers. I am friends with some childed people. I respect their decision and they respect mine. They understand that I probably don’t want to hear about their children or don’t want to look at pictures of their children. In that way, they keep that part of their life “secret” from me, if you will. I, in turn, don’t ever badger them about it, and we get along great. It just seems these people are in the minority, though.

Alas, this is just another example of how this world looks down on the childfree.

Do any of you other CFers have similar experiences? Share them in the comments!

I Support A Man’s Right To Choose

Now, before I get going, no, I’m not talking about abortion directly here. I fully support a woman’s right to choose to either carry to term or terminate a pregnancy, and I don’t believe anyone else on the face of the planet has any right to tell her what to do with her own body in that regard. That’s not what this is about. Rather, this is about giving men sort of a “separate but equal” option so to speak.

Women are (correctly, I might add) given sole authority in what happens to their body during pregnancy. They don’t need anyone else’s consent to have an abortion (not even that of the father of the child), as well they should not be required to (with the exception of under-18s in some places, which I’m also against requiring parental consent). That said, with such power should come responsibility. If the man wants nothing to do with the kid but she decides to keep it, it’s simply her burden and nobody else’s. As it is, the law doesn’t really work this way in most countries.

I don’t know much about child support laws in my home country, but the States where I’m originally from has child support laws that are stacked in favor of women and men are left hung out to dry. Men everywhere in the States and several other countries are stuck paying child support to children they want nothing to do with and completely waived any and all parental rights to. This doesn’t happen is 100% of cases (it seems to be up to the judge deciding the case whether or not to terminate child support payments) but it SHOULD happen in 100% of cases.

When a woman has an abortion she’s absolving herself of any and all financial and parental responsibility for that potential child. When a man signs over his rights, he’s just absolved of the latter. That doesn’t automatically absolve him from financial responsibility. This is wrong, and in this way, the law gives women way too much power.

For the record, I believe it goes the other way too. If the man wants the child, the woman doesn’t, but for whatever reason she chooses to carry to term and give sole custody over to the father and thus sign over her rights, I don’t think the father should be entitled to child support either, because now that child is HIS burden.

You might be saying “you’d believe differently if this happened to you.” Well, guess what? This exact thing did in fact happen to me, and I’m just going to go ahead and spill the beans about this, as I don’t tell many people this. My biological father never wanted anything to do with me. When he got my mother pregnant with me (this was her 2nd pregnancy with him, she aborted the first one) he walked out. His brother being the big-shot lawyer he was, drafted up a document that said he agreed to surrender parental rights in exchange for my mother not collecting child support. She agreed to the terms. I’ve not talked to my biological father but a few times, and I don’t even know if he’s still alive or what he’s up to these days. Do I hold anything against him? Absolutely not. I hold no grudges or hard feelings toward the man, and if he ever decides he wants a father-son relationship with me, the door is wide open. He doesn’t seem to want that, though.

Of course, in the meanwhile I was left to be raised by my evil step-father who I hated with every fiber of my being. I’d have rather had no father figure than him. He’s the one I’ll forever hold several grudges against. He didn’t come into the picture until several years later and I wish he had never.

So yeah, a man’s right to choose whether or not he wishes to pay child support. That’s what I’m in favor of. Of course, if he chooses not to he should be required to completely surrender all parental rights (including visitation, claiming the child as a dependent on taxes, and everything else), but I think that’s a fair trade-off. No man should be stuck paying child support to a child he surrenders all rights to, and it happens way too much.